So I am starting a new job next week. My last day with my current position is Monday. I’ve been in my position for 7 years as a team lead. My boss is an incompetent and weak leader who has been taking her personal problems out on me by talking to me abusively, yelling at me, being extremely passive aggressive and scapegoating me. This is because she basically sucks and hasn’t been able to keep up with her job demands so she would have me do important tasks and take credit for it . She has denied me leave so I missed out on an international trip of a lifetime last year after not taking any time off for 2 years during COVid and berated me for refusing to do simple admin tasks on my day off. She has abused my goodwill by expecting me to follow her every whim and if I question it or say no, by being nasty and passive aggressive, all when no one else is around to hear it. And then she gaslights. This is just the tip of the iceberg ; I have dozens of examples over the last few years
Around the time she started acting abusively towards me, she had a drastic personality change. She went from someone I would have described as the kindest and sweetest even almost a friend to someone I despise, nasty and bitter and delusional. It’s always all about her and how no one is grateful for all the hard work she does. She is endlessly a martyr. Guess what? She fills her schedule with endless meetings but accomplishes nothing. She purposely leaves me out of meetings and if I ever contribute she cuts me down because she can’t stand if I look smarter than her.
I was friendly with her previous supervisor because that person was willing to try to improve things and listened to me and the needs of our team. She was very professional and wanted to set quality improvement goals, which my boss was extremely threatened by. My boss doesn’t even listen when problems are told to her the tenth time in a row and then will scapegoat me to the higher ups . She also hid all the dirty laundry from the higher ups and kept saying everything was fine. Anyway; her boss left when she realized how toxic everything was. When my boss was under her she became histrionic to me on a regular basis. After that supervisor quit, she marginally improved.
To be clear, I have the technical expertise needed and am the glue holding the team together. She literally leaves me out of meetings that involve technical expertise, to the detriment of everyone.
She treats me, a star employee with 7 years of perfect evaluations and her right hand as complete shit, but doesn’t care if the rest of our employees who she should be managing don’t do their work or skip work.
We are in a sinking ship. I am one of like 7 people who have quit in the past month.
She is so dumb she didn’t think I would leave without asking her to be a reference so she’s shocked that she didn’t see it coming. Her supervisor who quit actually was my reference.
I would have gone to HR long ago but with her drastic personality shift I kept thinking this must be temporary and it would get better. When it first started, I even sent flowers and cookies to her house in sympathy for her having a “bad day” and maintain a good relationship with her. I didn’t understand why she was treating me so badly. I speculate alcoholism (she has called me slurring her words), mental illness, or age related decline . My coworkers call her Dr Jekyll and me Hyde because she flip flops so much. She’ll Answer the phone and say how dare you call me at this hour and then hang up saying call me anytime day or night.
I loved my job. I have a coveted government job in a field I am passionate about. It was a Cush position and it took me this long to give up on it . With her behavior, I possibly would have left a year ago but I needed to find another government job worth taking. The timing is good though, in a petty way , because I’m leaving her when she needs me most after all the years she’s taken me for granted and treated me like her servant.
The kicker is, when I submitted my letter of resignation, she asked me to write an email to her boss commending HER. She sent this request in email so I have proof. I’m ashamed to say I did it, because I was afraid of her sabotage in the last 2 weeks. I said the opposite of how I really feel. She asked me THREE times the name of my new manager. I told her the first name but the third time she asked I snapped at her that why would she need to ask me this 3 times in a row. She hemmed and hawed some bullshit response about wanting to know if she knew her . She is nosy and manipulative as fuck.
And yes, I know through the grapevine that she is worried she’s going to lose her job.
My question is, on my last day, should I at least say something to her boss ?